Happy Ash Wednesday! Here's your Mardi Gras porn.

I was not going to go out on Mardi Gras day. There is a tradition here that everyone wears a costume, weird or sexy or whatever, and walks to the Marigny and the French Quarter neighborhoods. From our house to the R Bar in the Marigny is 4.2 miles and an hour-and-23-minute walk according to Google Maps.

Since Elbow threw the male equivalent of a hissy fit when I said I wasn't wearing a costume or schlepping it to the Quarter, I woke up at 7:23 a.m. yesterday, put on sparkly tights and jorts and poured myself some cheap sparkling wine. Aaah, drunk people are so funny in the morning.

First stop was to our friend's St. Charles Avenue place to meet the Louisiana Festival Queens. Here they are in all their glory. There were supposed to be more of them but some must have needed extra beauty sleep.

So I totally don't fit in this picture, but see how I instinctively knew to bend one knee?

We met up with a small group and hitched a ride in the back of G's truck, which he parked . . . somewhere. I hope he found it. But we don't know because at 3 pm, Elbow abruptly decided he'd had enough. We had to leave behind the fun and the Tex Mex tacos I had ordered and already paid for.

Here's a snapshot of the day, plus a bonus from Sunday morning. You have to see what this lady caught. And on the Lord's day! For shame.

View of St. Charles Avenue

The crowd at the R bar

The Kiss in real time

2 dudes

Trippy

 

Pretty Good

Waiting for the tacos that never came

These 2 were almost nekked

Like the Wizard of Oz, but more enthralling

What's it going to say?!?

Bourbon Street

Dancing Girls

Is that Franco Harris?

Hail the King

You get bum and belly in this one

Again, weird

Peacock

Purple Drink

The coveted peepee beads

Carnival Season A-GAIN

I've eaten 17 pieces of king cake in three weeks. I found the baby twice. My favorite cake is from PJ's Coffee. The favorite of my office so far is the expensive-a*# one from Il Posto, which is really from La Boulangerie. Hint: It's $6 cheaper if you buy it from La Boulangerie.

Yesterday we took Buddy! to watch the Krewe of Barkus, where he caught a giant stuffed banana. Elbow and I caught some cups, but none of the novelty plastic poo that I really want.

And the little Bud-man was so tired after the parade, he slept from 6 pm to 6 am straight through. Here's a picture of the possessed (it's in the eyes) dog in his too-small turtle costume pre-gaming for the parade:

This party-goer needs a Bloody Mary STAT

 Our friends had a swanky engagement party for us. Here's a picture of the mini-cake. Look, I'm possessed, too:

5 seconds from smashing my face into this cake

This week we have lots more parades and lots more parties. Some of my girlfriends are going as festival queens, but I think my costume this Mardi Gras day is going to be "woman hiding in living room eating cake and watching Emma Stone chick flicks." Elbow is going as "Whatever Woman, I'm going out."